Light and shadows

light and shadows

This space is more like a diary, that explains why there are images and texts: they are thoughts of a day. Although I’m not completely sincere in that aspect so I think I’ve to confess a certain doubt, or perhaps a little sadness. I think in the importance to don’t save much to ourselves, those things are going to explode the same and sometimes in violent shapes, heavy thoughts, restlessness; and I try to choose the calmer path, don’t go around there nervous or unfocused. So I guess is better to write about it a bit and just accept that life is sometimes just like that.

These months I have thinking in a lady, and I think that lady thoughts in me too, but for personal problems she just doesn’t allow to love. But these last weeks she has changed and with that changes my mind tricks me thinking several scenarios where she’s just tired; others where she had found or accept another person, and others where simply she just obtained what she wanted. Of course those theories aren’t the reality (I know her and she’s a wonderful person) but my despair about her silence. I tried to induce communication and measure the reactions of her friends but in the end I just sit to think clearer and my conclusion is that she can’t allow herself to talk to me or she doesn’t want to talk to me. In both circumstances as a gentleman I think my only alternative is just end well with a smile for her, respect her wish, don’t ask explanations, be grateful for the shared time and the casualties that made her found me, and to hope she can have a happy life. In the end I just want her to be happy.

The photograph is a building in the coast, I drew the architectural plans and I think I made the electrical and electronic design too and that day I had traveled to modify the plans due to modifications from the owners. Homes in Peru actually are quite simple and don’t use extensive technologies to environmental comfort, communications or integration of smart devices with the structure. Although full of downsides the advantage is a less cost in energetic waste and contamination.

18 thoughts on “Light and shadows

  1. If your soul is empty (like the house in the picture) because of the lady, then do not forget that you’re an architect and you have to decorate your soul (like the house in the picture) and fill it with beautiful things. You should post a picture of the lady. Then everyone would have understood better, what is the problem with the lady!

    1. Thanks for the analogy Dan, although I believe that ornamentation if is not needed then it could be superfluous. I think I need just some time to have perspective. Well, actually I couldn’t post a photograph o her without her permission, even more I’ve some of street pictures but I try that the people aren’t too identifiable for their privacy, just to get a scale with the urban context. Thanks for the words.

  2. Hi Francis – You’re right – There’s a time when we have to stop speaking in metaphors and just talk about what’s causing our heartache, or else we risk the pain coming out in more destructive methods. If she’s worth waiting for, then you’re just going to have to wait because it sounds like she’s not ready. Whether you do this or decide to let go, it’s going to be painful. I wish I had a more cheery response, but you were honest, so I feel I must be too. Always remember, you’re not alone. So many people have been through this same thing, myself included. Cuidate, mi amigo :)

    1. Yes, I was worried when I replied to a visitor a bit harsh I think :$ I will have Job’s patience (although that sounds like I’m going to end very bad, lol) I appreciate your honesty Melissa :-) I know not always there are answers and when they exist sometimes are the kind we could not like, but still are much better than a apparently kind fiction. And totally agree about we all pass the same, so we all are learning how to deal with it.
      Cuídate también Melissa ^_^ Have a nice day, thanks for do nicer the mine.

  3. Communication is the lifeline of any relationship, without it, there is no hope :( I hope you can find someone to talk to, laugh with and love, without any angst involved.

    1. It seems like I’m going to need to program a computer for that, XD but not. Now I’m a bit with the head busy so I’ll give me some time to stay clearer. Thanks kind lady.

      1. Thanks, curiously I was seeing in Neflix the movie Transcendence. It was funny (although it was not supposed to be funny :P)
        If I were with the female robot I know six months after the beginning she would kick my back out of the house XD

      2. Yes, it was a bad think that I was laughing a lot. Some characters like Cillian Murphy just walk around and to be a great intelligence the character of Johnny sometimes is pretty dumb.

    1. Thanks kind lady, your flowers help me to understand that there is world beyond our personal turbulences, and that our problems perhaps aren’t that but points of view about things that just happens. Things will be better, sorry for make you read this -_-, I know you’re celebrating Mother’s Day there and I would love to give you something less stressing, so here goes a thanks and a smile from the other part of the world:

      1. It’s important to express ourselves, and that’s what blogs are for ! A great way to write down what we think, what we experience. You should be sorry about sharing something important to you :-)

      2. I know you meant “you shouldn’t be sorry…” but I love it, made me laugh because I felt like a guardian receiving commands from a queen :D
        You’re right, but still is true that I hope you’re having a happy holyday there ;-) here the mother’s day is sundays.

  4. Maybe, it’s of those moments in life where it’s good to remember that for everything lost, there’s something gained.
    Seasons come and seasons go.
    I wish you the best, Francis.
    Tal vez , es de esos momentos en la vida donde es bueno recordar que por todo lo perdido , hay algo ganado .
    Estaciones vienen y van temporadas .
    Le deseo lo mejor , Francis.

    1. I’m discovering the sense of seasons in your poems and photographs Caroline. Four seasons of your thoughts. I’m in love with your universe :-) I can understand more or less French in normal texts but poetry requires more delicacy to feel the details. I cannot stop to see and read your words, despite that part of the meanings are still under shadows to my understanding. Something that I consider almost harmful is to comment without knowing completely the meaning. Someday I’d love to say you that what I see is très belle and to write why I think it. But at least I can say you here that is quite beautiful what I see and everyday I walk with you across the seasons, now the river and the mountain are closer.

      Your words in Spanish has the sounds of a melody. It’s said that the best books are the ones that can survive any translation, and your thoughts are beautiful and they have passed the prove of the translation. As I discover everyday visiting you Caroline.

      Merci beaucoup. I feel grateful for the casualties that made me discover you. También te deseo lo mejor :-), Francis.

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